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Is that a dog chew in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
2005-01-04, 7:55 p.m.

No doubt about it my animals are spoiled. I just spent a small fortune at Petco purchasing things for both the dog and cat. The normal fur covered mice, and super potent catnip bags for Bonnie. Multiple chew toys for Muffin-Anne. I purchase the normal compressed chews flavored as bacon and peanut butter, designed especially for hard chewing dogs. Also the basted bones, which I�m sure 1000 years from now some archeologist will dig up and wonder why there is only portion of a cow in the burial (dog hole) site. However the ultimate favorite chewy for Muffin-Anne is a 36� penis. Yes I know, the disclosure of my dog chewing on a giant penis would make most people squeamish. Come on, it�s a bull dick, not my last husband or anything get over it. Here is a link to a website that sells the phallic dog chew - Bullysticks. I purchased 2 of them, one for her bed (wow that conjures up a whole different direction for this entry now doesn�t it? ) and one for the living room where she spends a good amount of time. Muffin-Anne is not one that carries her chewy toys from room to room. No, I end up purchasing them for the living room, the computer room, the bedroom, and the outdoor bed. Hell I�m dog-chewy poor when you think about it.

I think I was feeling guilty since I�m going away on business soon. So I guess I was out buying �guilt presents.� Muffin-Anne will be staying in the equivalent of a doggie 5 star hotel during my trip. They have the normal extra large kennel, complete with toddler bed, and TV for her viewing pleasure. Extended exercise and day care options. I�m very pleased with the accommodations for my dog-child. But I�m torn on whether or not to bring the porno chew toy. They indicate that you are more than welcome to bring your pet�s favorite toy or chewy�..do I bring in the 36� of dog glory? What do I tell them if they ask me to disclose what exactly the chewy consists of? This is a rather hoity-toity place, I�m not sure they would look favorably at my dog after she bounces in carrying a penis in her mouth. Maybe I�ll just bring the bacon-flavored bone and call it good. But I�m feeling guilty and she loves the bullystick more than the bacon bone. Ahhhh, the decisions one must make.