Raising the bar
2007-04-28, 7:14 a.m.
Sometimes it takes what you perceive as a disaster to force a major reassessment of your life. I think I�m finally to that point. I�ve spent the last couple year�s just lolly gagging my way through it thinking I was happy as can be. And to a certain extent that�s a pretty true statement.
That was until I decided to once again try loving someone and got stomped. Happens when you stick your heart out there. It�s part of the game, and it�s the part that sucks. But the thing that has come out of this is that maybe I wasn�t quite as happy before love, and maybe not so much when I was in love either. But I do know that I want to love some one again and therefore I have got put my heart back out there again as much as I don�t want to.
It�s also made me take a closer look at whom I�m willing to give a chance with that heart. I�ve reassessed my list of acceptable qualities. That might backfire because it�s shrinking the already dwindling pool of eligible men but I�m going with it. I�ve also made a commitment to be honest with those candidates up front. I�m on a mission, and it involves commitment and potentially kids. Here�s your opportunity to bail before my emotions get involved.
I may completely 180 this entry a week from now. But as I sit in CA. trying to mend a broken heart realizing I can�t pull off anymore whip cream on shit solutions or situations it seems like a good entry. This is also before any coffee, so yeah�it might be revised in the future.
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